by Terlonian

 Awaken the Giant Within

In the wee hours of the night, Tobias sat on the edge of the bed looking out the window.  A fierce rage swam up his body.  This was familiar, Tobias knew this feeling. It was the feeling he got when he went to court. The feeling he had when he was out for blood.  The feeling of a warrior. He had all his wits about him now.  He knew his father for what he was, he knew his wife for her evil and he finally saw the life he was living.  It made him sick to his stomach. Why did his father treat him like shit? Why did his wife treat him like a fool? When he was sick with alcoholism, why wasn’t she there for him? Why did she use his kids as a bargaining tool in there marriage? Why didn’t his mother want him?  It’s not like he was an evil person. She was very maternal. So why all the crap?  He gripped the bed even harder. At that point, he knew the good doctor was right. If he wanted to get his life on track, he would have to go get the answers to his questions and there was no time like the present.

Tobias put his clothes on as the sun crept over the skyline of the buildings.  He was very much in pain but the pain would have to wait. He had a job to do.  As he made his way to the door, it opened and David stepped in.


“Look, I know you don’t approve, but I have to go.”

“What are you talking about?  Tobias you are in no condition to leave this hospital.”

“Trust me, I know....but I have to get some things straight in my life.”

“TOBIAS WAIT....just wait....look, I can’t let you leave here in your condition,”

“You’re a good man David...and I appreciate everything you’ve done for me...I mean you no offense, but you can’t stop me. Please let me go.”

“Tobias, wait please...just....just wait......please.”

Tobias could see the doctors eyes. He didn’t want him to go. He had deluded himself to think he could win Tobias’ love and now he was leaving.

“...Tobias, give it another day or two. I mean...what’s so pressing about today, huh?  In your condition, what can you do today.  Wait till Monday, and I will go with you.”

“No...I’m going today.”


“DAVID! NO ONE IS LOOKING FOR ME........sorry, I didn’t mean to yell.....look, I’m only taking your advice. I need answers, David.  I want to know why my mom didn’t want me, why my father hates me, if Chris still......Look, I know why you’re doing this.  You told me you loved me. You want to keep me here for that reason....”

“No, it’s not that, in my professional opinion I...”

“David...don’t do that. The eyes don’t lie.”

David was dumbfounded.  He knew Tobias was right. He just didn’t want to admit it.

“Is that so wrong.....that I want to keep you here.....that I want a chance to earn your love and respect?”

“No, David, it isn’t. But I know you, of all people,  know  I have to get my life together before I can go on with it.”

“I know you have to but I just....”

“David, what if it were you?  Wouldn’t you want the numbers to add up in your life....especially if you took a break from it?”

David knew Tobias was right.  He was still concerned for  his health but he knew he was right.

“Yes, I would.”

“Then why shouldn’t I?”

“Tobias, I’m not saying you shouldn’t and yes I want you to stay because I love you...but I also don’t think you’re in any condition to roam around the city.  What happens if you don’t find the answers you are looking for...huh? What happens if you make yourself worse. You are not a well man, Tobias. As your doctor, I’m asking you  to stay.”

“And as a man with all his wits about him, I’m leaving of my own free will.”

“There’s nothing I can do to change your mind?”

“I’m sorry but no, you can’t.”

Realizing he had been defeated, he gave in.  He reached in his pocket and pulled out his wallet.

“Ok, I’m gonna give you some cash...”

“David, you don’t have to do that.”

“Tobias, taking on the world isn’t cheap and it isn’t free.  You don’t have any money. You need money for a cab and food and the phone. Speaking of the phone...here....this is my cell number. I take my phone with me everywhere and it’s on twenty-four seven.  If you need me...anytime, day or night, call me. Don’t hesitate. Can you at least do that for me?”


“Tobias please don’t dick me around on this. I’m serious.”

“David, I promise.”

“I’m gonna put my home address on here.  Tobias, if your lonely, or if you don’t find the answers your looking for, come to me.....better yet, call me and I will come get you.”

“David, I don’t want you to worry about me....”

“I do.”

“I know you do and you shouldn’t.  I’m going to find the answers to my
questions.  Then I’m gonna go home and clear my mind. After some time,
I’m ready, and if things are the same, I will definitely call you.”

“You mean that?”

“Yes I do.”

“Ok...I um....I......well...I had you a gift.  Well, it’s not really a gift, gift it’s a “this will help you get well gift, gift.....”

David opened the door and grabbed a cane from the hall.

“My plan for the day was to walk you down the hall, maybe outside for a breath of fresh air. You need to take it to help you get around.”

“Great, thanks.”

“Can I at least walk you out?”

“I’d like that.”

“You have to sign some papers first so...um...let’s go.”

David watched Tobias as he hobbled out of the room.  They stopped at the nurses station to sign the papers and proceeded to the outer doors. Tobias noticed the doctor walking very slow.  If he asked him why,  the doctor would spill some “you’re on a cane” rhetoric; but he knew the doctor was dragging out his last moments with him.  The doctor needed this...Tobias gave it to him. They stopped short of the tinted doors. The doctor took a deep breath and went in his pockets.

“Here....one more gift”


“Yeah....your eyes are still pretty bad.  You need to protect them from the suns rays till they heal some more.”

“They haven’t hurt before.”

“That’s because we have the blue tint on your windows. Trust me, your gonna need those.”

“Ok, let’s go.”


The automatic doors opened and the two men stepped out.

The two men stood looking at each other. The cool air tighten their pores and jailed the heat within them.  For the first time, Toby could see how much David loved him.  David had this stare that pierced you. He had eyes that allowed him to see the real person, rather than the external man.  The doctor gave it one more try.

“Tobias, please stay. Give it just one more day...a few more days and I will take off and we will go find your answers. Please?”

“David, I hear what your saying.  Thing is,  I feel like time isn’t a luxury I have.  For some reason I feel like things are lining up for me to get my answers today.  That’s why I can’t wait.  I have to do it today....I have to go today.”

David nodded his head in frustration as he took off his coat.  Tobias tried to reassure him.

“David, I have your cell number and I have your address.  If I need you I will call you.”


“David, I can’t take this.”

“Yes you can.”

“David, I’m not taking your coat.”

“Tobias, it’s chilly out here and you’re not over your flu.”

“But David...”

“Take the coat Tobias.”


“TAKE THE DAMN COAT TOBIAS!.....Sorry for yelling. I just...I just want you to take the coat.”


Tobias zipped up the jacket as David talked..

“Well, I guess this is goodbye.”

“No, it’s just a journey for me. You will see me again, David.”


Tobias shook David’s hand and walked past him. David watched him as he walked off. He hung his head and walked back into the hospital.

Tobias walked slowly from the hospital.  To be a man with his wits about him, he was very disoriented.  The roar of the city and the height of the buildings through him in a whirlwind.  He looked back to see if David was still watching him.  At one point,  he wanted to go back, but that would defeat the purpose. He took a breath and trudged on.  He walked a few more blocks till he finally found a cab.  He put his hand up and a cab slowed down. As he walked to the car, a group of teenagers jumped in and drove off.  Disgusted, he hailed another cab.  As another pulled up, he made a move for it. He had one foot in the car when he noticed an elderly African American lady with two kids and a baby trying to hail a cab.  The good nature in him wouldn’t let him take the cab.  He offered it to the lady.  Once again, he took a deep breath and hailed yet another cab. Another cab pulled over and Tobias hobbled his way to it. He was no more than two steps from it before a limo driver in a black ensemble stepped in front of him. Tobias was steamed.

“NO THE HELL YOU DON’T! I have been waiting for a cab for the last twenty minutes. It’s cold and I’m sick SO GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

The driver spoke to the cab driver as he gave him a  twenty dollar bill.

“Mr. Beecher won’t be needing your services today.”

The driver nodded and pulled away from the curb. Tobias looked at the man in amazement.

“What the fuck are you doing and how the hell do you know my name?”

The driver spoke as he walked over to a limousine and opened the door.

“Someone of your caliber shouldn’t be taking cabs, Mr. Beecher.”

“My caliber...what?”

“Get in the car, Mr. Beecher.”

“I’m not getting in that car. I don’t know you from Adam.”

“Mr. Beecher, I promise...after this ride your gonna be glad you met me.”


No sooner had he said that, a loud, raspy, deep, southern drawl escaped the limo.


The drawl hurt the ears of the people walking and lunching on the sidewalk. Confused, Tobias spoke.

“Who is that?”


Tobias wondered if the day could get any weirder.  He decided to give in and walked to the car. He stood at the door and looked at the man inside the limo.

“C’mon in here where it’s warm boy, you g’on get blue balls if you don’t.”

Against his will, he got in the car with the assistance of the limo driver. The limo was very nice with plush seats, a wet bar, stereo system, and television.  Across from him, sat a rather large gentleman in a cowboy suede jacket with gray hair, red face and a large black cowboy hat. Tobias didn’t feel threatened by the man. He was intrigued. He was taken off guard by the car as it moved; but decided to break the ice.

“Ok, I’m in the car. Who are you, what do you want and how do you know my name?”

“Now calm down boy...I mean shit, you’re jumpier than a virgin at a prison rodeo.”

“No. I want my questions answered.”

“Well I guess I owe you that.  Let’s start with the first one.  I’m William Cullpepper the second. Does that ring a bell for you?”


“William Cullpepper, boy.”

“You look familiar but your name means nothing to me.”

“Boy that wreck really fucked you over if you don’t recognize my name...well I guess I shouldn’t be mad...... I mean this is yankee country. Cullpepper and Associates Inc.?”

“Is that a company or something?”

“Well, in a way yeah.  I have law offices in every major city in the south. We represent more fortune five hundred companies than any other law firm in the U.S.”

“Oh, you’re that William Cullpepper?”

“So you remember me now?”

“Not really, but I figured if I acted as if I did, we could get on with the other questions.”

“Ok, boy here goes....I know you. I know everything about you. I’ve been watching you for about a year now. “

Tobias gave the man a look of disbelief. The man was so stereotypically southern, that he was hard to take serious.

“Now see, you don’t believe me...well how about this....you have a dick of a daddy, a bitch of a wife, two handsome kids and a mother that’s sweeter than sugar on candy.  You work at your daddy’s law firm and eat ice cream at the parlor over by the court house.  You were in a wreck and rushed to the hospital.  For a few days, you didn’t know who you were. Wanna know what kind of underwear you like or would you like to know your blood type?”

“How do you know all of this?”

“Like I said, I’ve been watching you.  Wanna know the best thing I know about you? You are one tough ass lawyer.”


“Ok boy. Let me put my cards on the table.  I like money. Now, I got rich because I’m not afraid to jump in the pool with fish that are bigger than me.  That’s why I have over one hundred offices across the south.  Now here lately, I’ve been getting a lot of calls from New York.  People, companies, millionaires, billionaires wanting representation from the best damn law firm in the U. S.  So I said to myself..what the fuck....yankee money is as green as hillbilly money.  So I’ve decided to build an office here in good ol’ NY.”

“Ok. So what does that have to do with me?”

“Well shit boy, you’re the best lawyer up here?”

“I’m not the best.”

“Bull shit, My boys have been watching you at work for a while now. You’re a pit bull in a court room. You argue like a Texan, boy.”

“That doesn’t make me the best.”

“Mr. Beecher, from what I’ve seen, heard and read, you’re better than any lawyer in my company from Southern Cali to Miami. Take that Roberts case. You got that boy off when everything was against him. And what did you use, a fucking traffic camera. That was genius. My boys wouldn’t have thought of that. Shit,  I’ve got lawyers in my company studying your cases and basically copying you.  Look, Tobias. I seek out the best, because I am the best.  In the state of New York, you are the best”

“So what do you want...a tour of New York, a place to build your office?”

“Nah boy, I want you to work for me?”

Tobias looked at the man in amazement.  Here was a very influential man seeking his services and respecting him for  his talent.  Tobias was showered with humbleness.

“You’ve been following me and apparently know everything about me....so you know I hate working for my dad.”

“Hell yeah...I hate you working with your daddy  too.”

“I’ll take your offer. I would be more than happy to join your fleet of lawyers. I um...I  worked well with the partners at my dad’s firm and I will do the same at your firm.”

“Boy what the fuck are you talking about?  You act as if I want you to be some ass whipped lawyer on the bottom floor of my firm.”

“Oh, I thought you were offering me a job...sorry”

“Well I am but I don’t want you to be some boy on the bottom of the pile. Shit, I want you to run the office.”


“Well shit boy, do I have to spell it out? Fine, I - W-A-N-T - Y-O-U - T-O - H-E-A-D - T-H-E  N-E-W - Y- O - R- K - O-F-F-I-C-E. I’m hoping your genius will trickle down to the others. You see, I plan on opening offices all over the north and heading each office with one of your proteges.  That is if you take my offer....”

“But sir, I’m flattered...your offer is....”

“Oh I see, you’re a guy that thinks about the money.”

The man reached in his coat pocket and pulled out a small note book. He
tore a sheet out and scratched a number on it.

“Take a look at that boy and tell me if that will convince you.”

Tobias looked at the number and almost passed out.  The pay he was being offered was more than what he was being paid at his fathers  prison. He just gazed at the paper as the man spoke.

“Ah shit. I see that look in your eye. Boy you like money as much as big daddy. Well shit, give me the paper and I will up it.....how’s that?....Not enough?....well shit,  try that.”

The man was literally throwing large six figure numbers at him without hesitation.  His mother always told him he was the best lawyer in the state and William Cullpepper was proving it.”

“So boy what do you say?”

“You’re offer is very generous sir. I would be proud to head your New York office.”

“Well that’s what I like to hear. You g’on make me a lot of money.....Well shit boy we gotta celebrate.  Where do you wanna go?”

“Well as much as I would love to sir....I have some things I need to take care of today.  Can we reschedule?”

“Don’t worry about it boy.  You need to do what that fancy pants doctor says.  Go get your answers.”

“You know about David?”

“Hell yeah and I know about you too.  I say do whatever the fuck you want to. Just make me some money....anyway, You’re in no condition to be walking all over the town. So you’re gonna drop me off at my hotel and you’re gonna take the limo.”

“Thank You, I appreciate it.”

“Sure, boy. You deserve it.”

Tobias held his head down to hide the tears.  Finally someone accepted him for whom he was. It was a feeling of relief. His ship had finally came in and it was a big one.  As much as he tried to hide his tears, the man could see them.  William felt a fatherly connection with Tobias. A connection he didn’t mind having.

“Go ahead boy, let it out. You’ve been through a lot.”

Tobias looked at the man and let the tears flow as they drove down the street.

The early morning sun rays shined through the skylight and woke a very drained Chris. Today, he was going to Texas with Zach to audition for a new stripping job.  Deep down he didn’t want to leave New York, but it was easier than staying and being sad.  On the other hand, he felt disrespectful for leaving so soon after Tobias’ death. His guilt and love paralyzed him in his bed.

Tobias’ limo pulled in front of his parents house.  He was apprehensive about returning to his boyhood home. Never the less, the first of his answers were in that house. The limo driver opened his door and Tobias stepped out.  He hobbled his way to the front door and knocked.  He could hear his mothers steps from outside the door.  With every step, his heart raced a bit more.  What if his dad was right and she really didn’t want him?

Tobias made a mental pact with himself. If his dad was right, he would forget the other questions and run back to David. Just as he was about to seal the deal with himself, his mother spoke at the door.

“Who is it?”

“It’s me mom.”


She opened the door very quick and looked at Tobias.  He was battered and bruised and limping. Her tears over took her. She was so happy to see him. Even she started to believe what Chris was saying.  Tobias could see how emotionally distraught and depressed she was.  His mother was pale. Her eyes were cloudy and she had lost a lot of weight.  Tobias could see the frail flower come back to life with every word he spoke.

“Hi mom.”

“OH MY GOD!!!!!    Get in here.....I knew it...I knew you weren’t dead. I felt it. A mother knows. I’ve been waiting for this good news after the bad news I received.  Tobias where have you been?  I’ve been everywhere looking for you after Chris’ news.   The storm was so bad and....”

“Chris’ news?”


“What did he say?”

“He saw some city workers pulling your car out of some ditch. They said you were dead...so he told me before anyone else could...but you’re here, you’re alive. I was so scared.”

“Chris told you?”

“Yes...when you were missing, he promised me he would find you.”

“Chris was looking for me?”

“Yes, honey. He called me daily..said he had been everywhere.”

The news was cooling to Beecher. The fact that Chris looked for him was reassuring; but he had to get himself back on track.

“Tobias you have lost so much weight and you sound horrible.  Let’s get you to your room and I’ll bring you some medicine and something to eat.”


“Tobias, you’re hurt and very ill I....”

“Mom, I have a question for you.”

“Well we can talk later...maybe you should see a doctor?”

“Mom when I was born, did you want me?”


“When I prosecuted the Dizzy case, dad told me you and he considered not having me. Is that true?”

His question stung her like a wasp. This was something she didn’t want him to know.  She didn’t know how to form the words or what she should say. Tobias took her silence as a reply and headed for the door..

“Oh my god it’s true.”


“Goodbye mom”

“Tobias let me explain...”

“No need to.”

“Tobias sit down.”



Tobias wanted to keep walking; but every child understands the anger behind a mother’s use of your full name.  He held his head low as his mother talked.

“Tobias, you know the trouble I’ve had with my heart?  The problem is that I had you and your brother thinking it started after you guys were born. The truth is it started before I was pregnant with you.  I suffered for a while and the doctors told me I was putting myself in jeopardy by having you. They said something about weak blood flow... that you might have some birth defects and things like that...that I should terminate the pregnancy and wait a few years.  My mother and father told me to terminate the pregnancy. Your aunt and uncles....they all stayed on my back to end it.  Even the Reverend told me to do it...said god would forgive me. Tobias they had me so scared. I couldn’t put a thought together in my head.  Then your father took me to Hawaii with him on a business trip. While he was in a conference, I took a walk on the beach.  I went to god and I asked him to help me.  I can’t explain it, but god told me to see you through. That he would take care of us.....and he did.  You’re here, you’re smart, you’re kind and you’re my baby.  Can you forgive me for everything....”

Tobias knew his mother’s words to be the truth.  She revisited the pain to make him feel at ease. She was the mother he knew and loved, not the actress his father made her out to be.  Like William Cullpepper said, she was as sweet as sugar on candy.

“Mom, there is nothing to forgive you for.  People can be hard to ignore. Your health was in jeopardy and by right, it was something you had to ponder.  You’re still the best mother in the world.”

She held her head in her hands and cried.  Tobias slid closer to her and hugged her. There were two injured hearts in the room. With time, she calmed down.

“Mom, I have something to tell you, but you have to promise that you won’t stop loving me no matter what. If you did, I would die. I swear I would.”

“Honey, you know better than that. You can tell me anything.”

“Ok, I um....um...I......”

“If you were standing up I would swat you on your bottom and tell you to spit it out Tobias.”

“Ok,...um...mom, I don’t love Gen.  To be honest, I hate her.  I hate my children’s mother. I no longer have the desire to rekindle anything with her.”


“I don’t love her...but....”

“But what?”

“I’m in love with someone else....but I’m afraid to tell you...”

“What? Are you afraid to tell me that this person makes your heart sing, that this person loves you from the inside out, that they make you feel alive.  That this person’s name is Chris Keller?”

“You know?”

“I’m your mother, I know everything.”

“When did you know?”

“Remember the banquet?....Chris’ eyes lit up when he saw you.  His body physically got bigger when you were close to him.  More than that, you glowed in his presence.  It was like one of  those old Hollywood movie scenes. You know..two lovers meeting in a smoke filled, dimly lit room?”

“You’re not mad?”

“Tobias, anyone that can put that kind of look in my son’s eyes can’t be that bad. Now,  I’m not going pretend as if I understand homosexuality. I’m a “bringing in the sheaves” kind of girl, but if this is what you want, then as far as I’m concerned, Chris is family. Now your father is another thing.”

“I don’t care about dad. Why do you love him anyway?”

“Why do you love Chris?”

“I just do Mom. I can’t explain it.  He makes me feel good, makes me feel alive.”

“I feel the same way about your father. He’s not perfect. He is very bullheaded and rude to others....but a day hasn’t gone by that he hasn’t let me know that I am his one and only.”

“Well, speaking of dad, it’s time that I  pay him a little visit.”

“Tobias, don’t do anything brash. You’re hurt. Just let it go, ok?”

“Mom, I can’t do that.  If I’m gonna get better, I have to do this. I’ll take care of myself...promise.”

“I know you will..I just...I don’t want you to lose you’re job.”

“Mom, I can’t explain now but that’s the best thing that could happen to me.”


“I‘ll explain later. Hey, do you still have those interior design books you bought in Australia?”

“Sure here they are...why?

I don’t have time to explain, I’ve gotta go.”

She watched Tobias as he hobbled to the limo.  As the car drove away a sense of pride warmed her body.  She wanted to do more to convince Tobias to stay, but deep inside she knew this was going to happen sooner or later. She took a deep breath and closed the door. Tobias was home and that’s all she cared about.

Mid-morning rolled around as the doorbell rang at Chris’ place.  He couldn’t imagine who would be at his door at that time of the day. His mother would call, it wasn’t time for Zach to come by and the mailman had already been by.  He summoned all his strength and got out of the bed.  He stood still for a moment as the doorbell chimed.  His muscles were so weak His mouth was dry and his mind was empty.  He stumbled to the door to find Quinn with a basket.

“Hey there.  My mom says that every growing boy should start the day with something healty. You can’t get any healthier than muffins, so I thought I would bring some over. I have hot coffee too.”

“Quinn, I’m not doing too well......I’m sorry but I can’t.”

“That’s all the more reason to have a bite. It’ll make you feel better.”


“Come on, one or two muffins won’t hurt”

Chris really didn’t want Quinn’s company. He figured that it would be easier to eat the muffin and get rid of him than it would be to just get rid of him.

“Fine...come in.”

“I‘ve got your favorites...blueberry with cream cheese frosting.”


“Come on sweety, you have to cheer up or I’ll never get the chance to pressure you into going to that new Italian place on the highway.”

“No, Quinn.”

“Why are you so glum?  Usually you would be leaning back in a chair with one hand between your legs and the other on your tits.?

“It’s nothing.”

“Come on, Chris.”

Chris didn’t want to share his grief with Quinn. Quinn was selfish and would find someway to lead the conversation back to himself. Never the less, if it would get him out faster, then so be it.

“Tobias is.....”

“Tobias is what?”

“Tobias is dead.”

The news bit Quinn like a viper.  He knew the trouble Tobias was in and could have helped but he didn’t.  Like all criminals, he tried to rationalize the incident to himself.

“Do you know for sure?”

“The guys from the city found his car in the flooded ravine. It was a mess. They searched the area...they didn’t find him.”

“Well Chris that doesn’t mean he’s dead. Maybe he swam out.”

“Quinn, if that were the case, he would have called his mother...not to mention his children.”

“For all you know Chris, Tobias could be long gone from here.  What if he said “fuck it” and just left.  You fell head over heels in love with a man that you didn’t really know.  Who is Tobias Beecher really? What if he left to get away from his responsibilities, his children, his mother, you?”

“Tobias wouldn’t do that. He loves his kids and couldn’t live without his mother.”

“You don’t know that.”

“YES I do!”

“Chris, I didn’t mean to upset you. I’m just saying that you don’t know as much about him as you think. Stop thinking with your cock and think with your head.”

“Quinn, I want you to leave.”

“I’m sorry. I should be a bit more sensitive.”

Quinn rose from his chair, walked behind Chris and massaged his shoulders.

“You know Chris, all you need is a diversion. You know...something to take your mind off Tobias.  Something sweet and sexy, that loves to suck and fuck and make you happy. Chris let me be that something. We could go in the bedroom and I’ll let you do whatever the fuck you want.”

“For real? You will do whatever I want you too?”

“You bet your big dick I will.”

“Good then I want you to GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!!!!!!!!!!”


“You are so fucking selfish Quinn. I am grieving, longing for the love of a man that is no longer living and all you can think to do is fuck me?”

“Chris you really need to get over this death scene stuff and do what you love.  You once told me you were the most sexual man on the planet. Why don’t you find that Chris again and......”

“And what....fuck you?”


“It’ll never happen!”


“Get the fuck out!”

Quinn gathered his things and headed towards the door.

“Fine, I’ll wait till you come to your senses and come back.”

“Don’t waste your time!”

Chris slammed the door and hit it with his fist.  Until Quinn came over, he did a good job of masking his pain. He walked back to the bedroom and fell head first into his pillow, trying once again to suffocate his pain.

As the limo cruised along the streets, Tobias made himself mad on purpose.  Tobias was one of those lawyers that operated well on anger. He thought about all the names his father called him. How he took Gen’s side on everything. How he made a mockery of his legal practices.  The anger was worse than he anticipated. He balled his fist up and hit the door. The pain shot up his arm and radiated through his body like a lighting bolt.

The pain shocked him stiff as he waited for it to reside.  When it did, he took a sheet of paper from the binder on the floor and wrote a note to Sandy about his new business venture and a list of attorney names from the firm. As the car pulled up to the law firm, Tobias took one of his mental game playing moments, took a deep breath and stepped out of the car.  It was time for him to vindicate not only himself but the other talented professionals in the firm.  He managed to enter the building undetected.  As he rounded the corner to his office, he saw the old black janitor cleaning an ash tray.  He was the man that pushed him in the wind that took him to Chris.  He stood behind the corner till the man moved away and then dashed into his office.  When he turned around he found Sandy crying while packing her things.  Even though he slammed the door, she didn’t know he was in the room.  Tobias interrupted her task.


She turned around with black tears flowing down her face. The expression morphed from sadness to pure exhilaration.

“MR. BEECHER!!!!!!!!!!!” I mean, TOBY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”



“That’s not important.  Why are you crying?”

“Your father came in everyday looking for you.  I made excuses for you as long as I could. Then, last week he told me that if I didn’t find you by this morning....I was fired.  I looked, Toby. I called everywhere...especially after the storm and I couldn’t find you. I even sent him an email from your computer to buy myself some time. I couldn’t find you. So, he came in this morning and he..he fired me.  What am I supposed to do?  My rent is due and .....”

“Sandy calm down. I’m gonna tell you something that is gonna make you very happy.”


“My dad firing you is the best thing that could’ve happen to you.”

“Ok, exactly what about that is supposed to make me happy?”

Tobias smiled and went to his coat pocket.

“Look, I don’t have time to explain. This paper will explain everything. Just know that you’re going with me...but hey, I need a favor.”


“Can you get in the companies computer mainframe?”

“No, they blocked my security code.”

“Can you use my code?”

“On your computer, yes.”

“Ok....first, I want you to read this note. Second....you see these names, I’m gonna send as many of these guys to you that I can within the next ten minutes.  All I want you to do is explain my note to them. Third...make a copy of every high profile client this firm has.  When you get them, get lost. Don’t worry about your rent, my dad is gonna pay it for you.  Do you understand me?

“Read note, explain note, copy files, get lost...got it.”

“Trust me, your life is about to change.”

“Yes sir!”

Tobias left the office in the same manner he came in.  He slid along the walls till he came to the elevators.  He pushed the button and waited for the doors to open.  As he waited, he could hear Sean Green, the lawyer he was in competition with for the partnership, whistling  ‘Danny Boy’. He stepped in the empty elevator but didn’t allow the doors close.  When Sean passed in front of the doors, Tobias  grabbed him and pulled him into the elevator.  The abduction scared Green to death. He held his heart as he talked.

“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING, BEECHER?  And what happened to you?  You look like shit!”

“Calm down....look, I don’t believe for one moment that we were being considered for a partnership.  I just think the old farts wanted us to win so they could save face in their social circles.”

“You’re just now figuring that out?”

“Look, I want you to do me a favor.  I want you to go see my secretary. She has something to tell you.  I want you to find Garrison, Yates, Newman, Edwards, Black, Mc Pheeley, Harrison and Harper and take them with you. If you guys want in, you have to pack up your stuff and leave by lunch.”


“Trust me on this.”

“No, I can’t do that? There is nothing you can say that can make me leave......”


“What, how do you know...”

“Just go see my secretary.”

“Tobias, what’s this about?”

Tobias gave Sean a look of triumph.  Sean could be hard headed, but he knew Tobias’ smirk. This was huge.

“Trust me Sean, Armageddon has come for this law firm.”

“Ok....I will go tell them now. Where are you going?”

“I’m going to the big cock table.”

“You’re what?”

“Sean, I’m about to go in there and say what every lawyer in the hell hole wants to say but won’t.”

“Cool, take my recorder and tape it.”

“I’ll do you one better. Talk to my secretary and then have everyone come listen outside the partners door.”

“Ok, I’m going to get everyone right now.”

“Come listen but leave no later than lunch, Sean.”


The bell on the elevator tolled and Sean ran out.  Tobias pushed the button and went to the top floor.  An arrogant smirk took over his face. Finally, revenge was about to be his.  The elevator stopped and the doors slid open. Tobias hobbled down the hall till he came to the big door.  He remembered how he sat outside the door while the old farts made him wait.  He could smell the cheap cigars and hear the laughter coming from the room.  A room full of bloated men attempting to be intellectuals but falling short. A room full of imbeciles pretending to be scholars. It was time for a reality check and he was the one to give it to them.

He knocked softly on the door with his cane. A loud stuck up voice pierced the door.

“GO AWAY!!!”

Tobias was unyielding.  He knocked a bit harder.  The partners stared at the door.  They wondered who had enough balls to continue knocking after they had been ordered to stop. One of the men, Mr. Olen decided to continue the verbal threats.


The men let out a burst of laughter and the statement but was quickly interrupted with three very loud and very hard knocks.  This time the men gave the door all their attention.  An eerie feeling took over them. Usually, a threat would result in fast footsteps retreating down the hall but this was weird.  Mr. Olen tried his threat one more time as he walked to the door.

“I don’t know who this is but consider yourself FIRED!!”

As he opened the door, Tobias walked in.  The hobble was gone. Like clockwork, Tobias father stood up and addressed him.

“Tobias, when are you going to learn to do what you are told?  You were told to go away and still you..........”

“SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Tobias words made the men sit back in their chairs.  This wasn’t the mild mannered suck pig they knew.  The men knew he was for real.  Mr. Olen attempted to say something but decided against it when he saw Tobias’ face. Instead, he took his seat.  Once again, His father tried to talk.

“Tobias you weren’t raised to....”


Tobias stared all the men down.  He rubbed his hand along the cherry wood table. A vicious smirk took over his face as he talked.

“You guys think this is a cherry wood table.  Well, we pions on the floors below you, we refer to this as the big cock table.  You know, the table where all the big decisions are made...where the gods of this firm piss on everyone else.  You know I have to give it you...you really had us scared to defy you.  You made us think that this firm was the pinnacle of a legal practice.  You treated us like shit.  The only person that had any redeemable quality in this room was Mr. Anderson, and while we’re on Anderson, let me say something.  When you all offered me a partnership, you all made fun of Anderson’s health condition.  Let’s get something straight, Mr. Anderson had more legal genius in his shit than you fucks will ever have.”

Tobias father interjected at the use of profanity

“Tobias I don’t want to hear another profane....”

“I’m sorry dad, I guess you didn’t hear me the first time. SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!!!!!!..... Mr. Anderson was very influential to me and I laud him for his practice.  He’s a good man. A man that when I wonder why I became a lawyer, he reminded me. A man that was more a father to me than you are dad. You guys,  on the other hand suck ass.  You guys couldn’t win a case if the defendants pleaded guilty.  Your closing arguments are more like a full body dry heaves than persuasive rhetoric. Your like archaic cavemen, fumbling yourself through your cases. That’s why you need people like Green, Newman, Edwards, Black and myself to win cases for you. The big cock table....what the fuck is that.  You guys don’t know what a big cock is..not with those shriveled pieces of nothing between your legs.  You guys wanna see a big cock?”

Tobias balanced himself,unzipped his pants, and threw his cock on the table. The partners were shocked. Some because of the act and others because it was a big cock. One of the men spoke


“This, my friends is a big cock. A big, long, pink cock. A young cock. A cock with a mind of it’s own.  A viagra free cock.”

Mr. Olen smiled and dropped his head as he spoke.

“You know Tobias, I never wanted to say it out loud because your father and I are such good friends but I always took you for a fag.  I mean any man that would show his dick to another man has to have some fag in him. That’s why you would have never been partner.”

“Because a partner can’t be a fag, right?”

“No room for fags at the big cock table.”

“Well that’s funny Olen, because the whole time I’ve been talking you, Mr. Gold and Mr. Epperson haven’t taken their eyes off my cock. You like what you see boys?”

Gold and Epperson diverted their eyes before the partners could look. Tobias redirected his assault to his father.
“Dad, you’re the one that really disappointed me.  You’ve always been a bitch to me...but I thought that maybe you loved me enough that you wouldn’t let anyone hurt me as you have. That you wouldn’t let anyone use me as much as you have.  You knew good and well that Green and I had no chance of making partner and still you let these dumb fucks use me.  You know...all my life, I’ve done whatever you’ve asked me to do. Not because I wanted to, but because I thought maybe...just maybe,  if I did, you would love me as much as you love my brother. But no matter what I do, no matter how many hoops I jump through, it wasn’t enough.   Dad, I have been MIA for more than two weeks. I had a wreck, fought for my life in a germ infested, water filled ravine.  I was saved by a very good man. I’ve been in a hospital, out of mind.  I didn’t know who I was for the longest time. But what made it worst is that you, my father wasn’t looking for me. You don’t love me. You don’t care about me. You never did.  Mom didn’t want to abort me, YOU did.”

“Tobias get the corn cob out of your ass. Your just jealous that your brother is kicking ass.”

“My brother is kicking ass because he’s driving to town without you knowing and getting help from me. That’s why he’s winning his cases.  Speaking of cases, would all of you dumb asses like to know how I won that case? Well after being threatened by my dear father to do whatever it took to win the case, I got some information about a male stripper that danced to that music. So I went to see him perform. He blackmailed me...made me go on a date with him for the info. We went to gay dance clubs, cock art shows and shit.  Then he took me to his place. He kissed me, kissed my stomach, my chest, licked my nipples and made me laugh. He loved me.  You see dad, I was with a man to win my case.”

“Tobias, please tell me you didn’t let this man fuck you?”

“Well, not yet..and more than likely I will never get to. You see, I treated him like you treat me..badly. More than likely he’s gone.”

“Tobias who the fuck do you think you are. Did you really think you could come in here and scare us with your dick and fag shit?”

“The only thing I need to scare you is four words.”

“Oh really, such as?”

Tobias took a cigar from the box on the table, pulled out a chair, and sat down.

“William Cullpepper and Associates.”

The men choked on his words as their faces turned red.

“William Cullpepp....What do you know about them.”

 “Well dad, you weren’t looking for me, but he was. And guess what, he  found me. Apparently he wants to build a firm here. Wanna guess who he wants to head it?”


“Give the man a prize, boys. Right about now, my secretary is calling Mr. Anderson. He will be an asset to MY firm. It’s my goal to ruin this firm. I’m gonna shove this bitch straight up your asses.”

“I don’t believe this for one minute.”

“Well dad, that’s ok. Just stroll through the halls after lunch. You’ll believe me then.”

“What’s that suppose to mean?”

“Just do it....well, it’s time for me to go. I have one more person to lay the smack down on. So goodbye, good day, suck my dick and kiss my ass.”

Tobias grabbed his cane and walked out.  The partners looked at each other with troubled faces. They knew Tobias was talented and with Cullpepper banking his new venture, he could definitely follow through on his threats. As Tobias passed through the halls, he could hear the other lawyers packing up there things. When he made it to the bottom floor, he opened the door to his office to find Sandy gone.  “Good girl”, he thought.  As he exited the building, the limo drive stepped out and opened the car door.

“Where to now sir?”

“We’re gonna pay my wife a visit, 2222 Nightingale Lane.”

As the car pulled away, a since of pride and strength took over Tobias. He won a battle with himself and his father. He couldn’t believe he threw his cock on the table. That was so a Chris Keller thing to do.  Tobias reminisced on the times he spent with Chris. He mentally kicked his own ass for not telling him how he felt.  Chris was his last conquest of the day, but some how he knew it was a losing battle. Chris has another love and it was killing him. At one point he had planned on telling Chris about Quinn leaving him in the water. He quickly decided against it. The time for last minute epiphanies and finger pointing was over. No matter how he tried to manipulate the situation, the answer was always the same. Chris was the prize and he was the loser.

Noon found Chris gathering bath gel and towels for a shower. He really didn’t want to go to Texas.  He tried to call Tobias’ mother but the phone just ringed. Maybe she had company. All he wanted to tell her was that he was going to Texas unless there was going to be some service im memoriam to Tobias.  Deep down he knew he had to go on but when you’ve been loved by Tobias and when you love Tobias, it’s hard to do.  The phone rang in his bedroom. He checked the caller I.D. to find it was Mrs. Beecher. Why was she calling? What did she want? What if Tobias’ body had been found?  He decided to ignore the call. If it was bad news, he couldn’t take it.

Tobias pulled up to his wife’s house. He didn’t waste anytime. He went to the door and knocked very loudly.  His children came to the door.


“Hey pumpkins. Have you guys been good?”


At that point Gen walked in and sneered at Tobias.  He returned her look with one of his own and she knew something was up. He gave the kids a dollar and sent them to wait on the ice cream truck Like the viper she is, Gen started in on Tobias.

“What the hell are you doing here. You look like shit, but what else is knew.”

Tobias revisited the smirk he gave his father as Gen continued to talk.

“I went by your apartment two times last week and you weren’t there. The place was a mess...almost as much a mess as...”


Gen’s eyes grew big.  What just happened? Tobias talking back, with volume? Did she detect a back bone? She had to test him.

“Don’t come in my house and....”

“I SAID, SHUT THE FUCK UP, GEN!!!  You see, today you don’t get to do any talking. You don’t get an opinion. You don’t get shit.  Today is the day
that you just listen.”

Gen fell back on the sofa. Tobias had a backbone, times had definitely changed.

“You know Gen, it would be totally wrong of me to blame you for the tragedy that’s us.  I screwed up..when I was sick with alcohol. But even though I was sick, you are more a bitch now,than I ever was as a drunk. You never tried to help me whatsoever. I quit drinking for my kids. It’s the best decision I ever made.  But there is one decision I made that I regret. I regret marrying you, Gen.”

She looked at him in amazement. His need for her and the kids is what kept him wrapped around her finger. What will she do now?

“I use to feel so guilty saying that I hated my kid’s mother....but the truth hurts doesn’t it.  I hate you Gen. I can say it now and I don’t feel guilty.....”

“I can’t wait till I talk to your father, Tobias.”

“You can talk to that geriatric mother fucker all you want to. I don’t work for him anymore.  You see, you can’t use him against me anymore. He, like you. mean absolutely nothing to me. I hate you both equally.  No, I don’t work for him anymore. I’ve moved on to bigger and better things.  Which brings me to you. Gen, I’m divorcing you, I’m making it official.”

“What do you take me for, Tobias? A fool? No, I won’t give you a divorce.”

“Oh really?”

“You got it!”

“Oh ok.”

Tobias pulled out the books.

“You know Gen, books are amazing. Someone sits down and put pen to paper and all of sudden here's this volume of truth and consequences for the world to see.  Like for example, when my mom went to Sydney for vacation, she bought these interior design books.  As I sifted through the book, I came upon this picture and I said to myself....is this same bedroom that Gen designed for the Carmichael’s?  Didn’t she say it was a one of a kind original design?  Well that was crazy of me so I went further in the book and I stumbled on this picture.  I was like, now wait, that bathroom really looks like the same bathroom Gen designed for that record producer. The bathroom in this picture was designed by a Japanese college student. What the hell? Could Gen be stealing her designs from obscure and up and coming designers and passing it off as her own work? Hmmmm....and what’s worse, what if all the men and women in her social circle were to find out that she’s a FRAUD!  Would she be invited to parties, and gatherings?  Would she be invited to fashion shows, jewelry debuts, tea parties? Would she have to relinquish her design awards? Would she ever work in this town again, or any town for that matter?  Where would she go? What would happen if this got out.  If I were to tell Mrs. Gaines, it could be out before the end of the day. What would the people...”


“I thought you would never ask.  First, in a few days, divorce papers will arrive. You will sign them. Whatever you earn is yours. I will take care of the children. YOU will get not one cold, red cent from me.  Second, you and I will share custody of the kids. I won’t take them...all kids need to be with there mothers, but if you challenge me for custody at all I will fucking ruin you. Third, you are gonna speak of me in the utmost regard. You’re gonna make all your rich friends think I am manna from heaven. Your going to tell them that I am heading a new firm and they should avail themselves of my services.  Gen, by the end of the year, I want ten referrals with your named attached. You understand me?”

“Fine, Tobias now will you leave?”

“Not just yet. I have one more bomb to drop on you.  How do you think your circle of friends would react if they knew that you lost your husband to another man?

“What?  Tobias...you’re gay?”

“Not in the biblical sense but if you count having a guy lick your nipples, then I guess so.”

“Are you out?”

“No, and I don’t really plan on doing it anytime soon. But if you falter on one of the things I have told you, I will sing like a jay bird. Do we have a deal?”

“Fine Tobias!”

As the conversation came to a close, the kids entered the door. Tobias kissed them, promised them a weekend to remember when he felt better and left the house.  Tobias felt like a superstar. He was three for three in his day of conquest. He faced the two demons and he won.  Now he had one more thing to do.....one more person to see.  He swallowed heavy as the thought of seeing Chris danced in his mind. He didn’t know what to expect. According to his mother, Chris thinks he is dead.  It was time for Tobias to see Chris. It was time for the resurrection of Tobias Beecher.

To Be Continued

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